Sleeping through the night ... at last!

Last month, I was wondering if it was a fluke that micro-b slept through the night. It turned out that it was ;) Then, we were still in Finland and a week later, we returned to Chengdu. Miraculously, micro-b began to sleep through the night consistently upon our return. I wasn't about to celebrate prematurely in case it was jet lag but it has been 3 weeks now and I didn't have to wake up at 3am once in that period! ....[victory dance]....

In fact, micro-b's quite the perfect baby sleep-wise. The last feed usually ends at 10pm, we zip him up in his sleeping bag (he'll kick off his blanket otherwise) and he sleeps until 8 the next morning. Bliss!!

Here's a series of pictures I took while in Finland in mid November.



microbeanie is 3 months, 1 week & 3 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year & 4 month old toddler

Potentially embarrassing moments

I may be wrong but I think it may be a rite of passage for every parent to be embarrassed by her toddler. Since we had been eating a fair bit of pomelo, mini-b often gestures that he wants his share with, "anna (Finnish: give) porno".

And because it is tricky for a 2 year-old tongue to wrap around the 'tr-' sound, it often sounds like he's saying, "f**k, f**k, f**k" when he was simply pointing to his 3 trucks. We have some explaining to do in front of friends.


microbeanie is 3 months, 1 week & 2 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year & 4 months old toddler

Linguistic sponge

For a few months, mini-b has referred to himself as "boy". It always brings a smile to our faces when he says, "mama, dada, baby, boy", "boy cwwhy" (cry) or "BOY!" when he wants to express that something belongs to him. On this trip to Finland though, he has finally learnt how to say his own name. Quite a feat considering how long his name is...we could have been nice and chosen a 1 or 2 syllabi name like John or Tomi. mini-b introduces himself as "Hasasan" or sometimes "Hassan" :D

It also amazes me how fast he's picking up language now. Before we came 2 weeks ago, he said, "hands pois (Finnish: away) please" and from his playschool teacher, he apparently said, "Everybody 洗手 (Chinese: wash hands)". I suppose it's inevitable that he mixes the languages he's learning everyday.

Thanks to his fav Ten Little Ladybugs book, mini-b can now count to 10 in English & Chinese. We also talked a lot about colours. M&Ms are great teaching tools ;)


microbeanie is 2 months, 1 week & 5 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year 3 month old toddler

A fluke

Yes, it was a fluke! Judging by mummy's red eyes this morning at 7, and micro-b's wailing that woke up dada and minibeanie. It was time for the boys to get up anyway and go get flu-jabs for mb. Well, we can't expect micro-b's sleeping pattern to change in one go. The trend is for the better anyway

-dada

microbeanie is 2 months, 1 week & 3 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year old toddler

Through the Night!

micro-b slept through the night for the very first time last night! He had his last feed until 10pm and I thought, well, he'd be up 3 or 4am as usual. But no, I woke up at 10am. Yes, 10 o'clock, a sane hour to get up when it's considered day, not 4am when the only things up at that hour are drunks lumbering home and crickets. You see, I got to get up at 10 because dada took the 7am shift AND micro-b was a perfect baby.

Was last night a fluke? We'll see...


microbeanie is 2 months, 1 week & 2 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year old toddler

A Finn in the making

There's always something that makes one distinctly Singaporean, Finnish, Chinese.... It could be eating certain strange foods or some ritual that's totally based on culture. Today, mini-b climbed onto the dining chair and started rummaging through its stuff. He came to me all sheepish and said, "eat". I thought he had found the bag of M&Ms on the table and helped himself to a chocolate buffet but when I went to the table, lo, it was the box of salmiakki.

To non-Scandinavians, salmiakki is the black stuff that everyone else on this planet hates. It was once banned because it was made from ammonia. And this particular box was actually bought from the pharmacy :D Personally, despite my adventurous spirit towards exotic foods, I stop short at salmiakki (even if I crave for salmiakki ice-cream, go figure ;) mini-b is more Finnish than I thought.



microbeanie is 2 months & 1 week old
minibeanie is a 2 year old toddler - and up to no good

October 09

It had been FOREVER since the last post :P I do know that some of you are following this blog so I'm sorry to disappoint. Besides the fact that I hardly have time for anything these days, it had proven impossible to log onto Blogger (& Facebook for that matter) recently. Either the proxy server I'd been using needed some new config or that China's Great Firewall had finally caught up with it, I don't know. My tech support guy had for some reason been quite busy as well ;)

Well, tons had happened in the last month or so. In a nutshell, here's what happened in October 2009.

• We took a whole week to 're-tune' mini-b's sleeping habit back to sleeping alone in his own room. A month of molly-coddlying by his paternal grandmother did some damage. The worst night was when mini-b came to our room crying for the 3rd or 4th time after being accosted back to his bed and I was ready to cave and let him climb into our bed at 6am. Thankfully, DH held his fort.

• mini-b started half day playschool at Eton House! We're really proud of him for he didn't cry a single bit. All he needed was to be shown the train set and he would settle right in :D The main focus was on gaining independence such as eating by himself, washing his hands, putting on his shoes etc. He also learnt boundaries, respecting others' rights & group work such as there's a time for art class and Chinese class (<-- I was told by the teacher, Miss Lauren, that he isn't so hot for Chinese class... fell asleep once! :D the apple didn't fall too far from the tree, I thought. I think school had done mini-b a world of good. Just 3.5 weeks into it, I noticed that he'd begun using a lot more words. The stimulation he received in that 3.5 hours everyday was certainly a lot more than what I could give at home even without a certain bundle.

• Speaking of the bundle, micro-b had grown! He had started smiling and sleeping for longer stretches of time. Hallelujah! Right before we left Chengdu for Finland, the longest he slept at night would be 5 hours - waking up just once to feed in the night. It was a huge improvement over the last week when 2 night feeds actually meant at least an hour of sleep less.

I'd put up some pictures if I could. Here are a couple from the first week of micro-b's birth. Already feels like ancient history.

19 days old

Big brudder the tutti pusher

microbeanie is 2 months & 3 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year old toddler

Breastfeeding hell

The first week of breastfeeding had been hellish. True to form, this little guy who had been doing gymnastics in my belly at 1am, was most restless at that hour from day 1. I recalled (just 17 days ago but it seemed like a lifetime already!) being kept up for most nights in the hospital soothing and breastfeeding him. It was especially frustrating when the milk hadn't 'come in'. I can't imagine why anyone would enjoy this thing called breastfeeding. The whole process would take me at least an hour and that was being optimistic.

Unlike some lactating mums who are like cows, I never had an overflowing problem. And although I was assured by my lactation consultant that eventually supply would increase with demand, the process of enduring 2 days of continuous sucking that result in sore & tender nipples, not to mention keeling over a baby perpetually tethered to my breast, the thought of bottle feeding became an increasingly attractive option.

Bottle feeding also allowed DH to share in the load and bond with the baby. The shorter time taken to feed also meant more time could be spent with my elder bean whom I felt had been neglected by me of late. Such is the complexity of the decision! Parenting today is all about guilt management. Guilt from depriving a baby from the 'best' milk; guilt from not spending enough time with the child; guilt from choosing a career over the home... At the end of the day, there wasn't a one-size-fits-all solution for every issue. What mattered most was a judicious weighing of costs versus benefits. With that, I'm at peace with my decision to supplement with the bottle. And just like that, I got out of my breastfeeding hell.


microbeanie is 2 weeks & 3 days old
minibeanie is a 2 year old toddler

micro.b's Birth Story

It's now a week since Lucas was born last Sunday in the wee hours of the morning.

1900 hrs, Saturday
After a day of being out and about, I was relieved to get a moment to sit down before dinner. While DH was in the gym, my water bag burst. There was no doubt about it. I wasn't about to make the same mistake as the last time when I mistook it for a show. In fact, I think I saw bits of the mucous plug in the trickle. No need to press the alarm button by summoning DH from the gym immediately as it'd still take awhile. On DH's return, as I was blogging and logging onto Facebook I calmly told him that we had to go to the hospital. The look on his face was priceless :D

2000 hrs
The hospital was a mere 5min ride away. We sauntered into the delivery ward as pre-admission was all done a week before. I was in a great mood. Everything felt right.

I was given the hospital gown to change into which btw was the most undignified piece of garment ever designed because it exposed one's posterior in the most inglorious fashion. Told to pee into a cup which was a very difficult thing to do for preggies or 300lb folks because our bellies extend so much we just couldn't see down THERE much less pee into a tiny cup.

The fetal monitoring device (CTG) was strapped on. Everything normal there - no signs of fetal distress, healthy heartrates and contractions 8-10 min apart. Only minor discomfort felt.

2045 hrs
2 cm dilated.

2130 hrs
We got the ok from our gynecologist, Dr Kowa, to have our dinner. DH trooped down to Takashimaya's foodcourt for some takeaway. Excellent minced meat 'mee tai mak'! (despite having to pause occasionally for surges to pass). Contractions 7-8min apart.

2330 hrs
Dr Kowa arrived for the preliminary assessment. 3-4cm dilated. Great that it's progressing without the need for oxytocin. Contractions felt stronger but nonetheless bearable. He estimated delivery to be at 0500-0600. Remembered kidding with Dr Kowa and midwives.

0000 hrs
Surges coming on strong. As with minibeanie's birth, I reached for the laughing gas (50% nitrous oxide & 50% oxygen) though one had to be out of her mind to laugh at that point.

DH had a coffee to stay awake. Moto GP was on the overhead tv. Surreal.

0100 hrs
Strong contractions that reached the peak of the CTG scale. 5cm dilated.

0120 hrs
Huge surges 3min apart. The air-condition which I had requested to be colder made DH don 2 shirts, wrapped a towel around and huddled beneath the baby heater. Meanwhile, I was perspiring buckets.

DH requested a second cup of coffee. Hmm...

0137 hrs
Dr Kowa was called back. 8cm dilated! Glad that the end was in sight.

0150 hrs
Thought I felt rectal pressure. A VE showed that baby had descended but he was still too high up. Guess it was a false alarm. Maybe an earlier prediction of delivering by 0230 would come true...

0210 hrs
Contractions on CTG started to 'merge' i.e. long & frequent. I recalled using the f-word at some point.

The midwife started laying out the equipment on a trolley.

0300 hrs
10cm dilated at last! The stirrups were brought out. Time to push! DH said he was worried when Dr Kowa rolled out his arsenal - scalpels & what-nots of all sizes.

No idea how many times I was told to push. All I remembered was being told by midwife to push for 10 counts 3 times with each wave. The contraction pain which had me grabbing the pillow were now secondary; instead, the main sensation now was the intense need to get the baby out. A stinging sensation was felt that only intensified with each push & surge. Finally, when the sting was at its most intense, the baby's head emerged. The rest was easy.

0323 hrs
Lucas was born! :)

Relieved that there were no tears and no episiotomy needed .... and no painkillers of either pethidine or epidural used. We stayed in the delivery suite for an hour or so to breastfeed. At 0530, I was transferred to a gurney and wheeled to our room where we would all room in for the next 2 days.

It was a great birth experience :)


minibeanie is 2 years, 1 months, 2 weeks old
microbeanie is 1 week 1 day old

This is it

I've been having contractions on & off since this morning but they have been irregular. No need to push the panic button yet. After all, they last barely half a minute and they feel like mild menstrual cramps.

Not just any day but any time now.

10 minutes ago as I was putting 2 yoghurt bars into The Bag for the hospital, a sudden wetness was felt. It was the water that had been cocooning microbeanie for the last 38 weeks. It wasn't a gush but it wasn't just a little either. And from what I learnt the first time, this is it.

Funnily enough, dada is still in the gym. No need to run to get him. I can wait and so can microbeanie :)


minibeanie is 1 year, 1 month & 1 week old
microbeanie is 38 weeks 3 days in utero

Rant

In my second trimester, I bought a support pillow that's filled with styrofoam-beans (think beanbag) in the hope for a good night sleep. Well, it worked. The support pillow moulded to my belly and gave the support needed. At last, I got some restful sleep. Not now, however. I've 'outgrown' the pillow and didn't bring it along with me to Singapore. Now, the belly just plonks itself on the bed like a huge boulder :D Turning on the bed was also akin to Obelix hoisting a boulder - with 2 hands on the belly!

My hips are even more achy now. The baby's head is already engaged rather low down. This is in sharp contrast to the time I was carrying minibeanie. I think it's because since this is the 2nd pregnancy, my hips/pelvis have 'stretched' so microbeanie's head is able to descend earlier. Proof irrefutable that a woman is NEVER quite the same after childbirth! In fact, when i walk these days (or waddle, more like it), there's a slight pressure in my pelvis...quite uncomfortable and much worse than the first time when I pretty much didn't feel anything.

As to being back in Singapore, the food is awesome. We've been drinking lots of local coffee (kopi), tea (teh) etc. DH just discovered a very nice teh-cino in the neighbourhood coffeeshop.. Hmm, I wonder if I should play my pregnant card and get him to go down to buy tehcino and prata for me sometimes :D

Today was a busy day. Besides going for my weekly checkup, we did the hospital tour as well. I'm up to my head with all the forms I've to fill for the Baby Bonus and admission etc... And I'm kicking myself for forgetting to bring our marriage certicate!!! I set it aside a few weeks ago, made a note of it but OF COURSE I forgot to pack it when the time comes! and it's needed for birth registration :(( will have to call up ICA or ROM tomorrow........

We did the Mt. Elizabeth tour today. Quite nice. It was the first time that DH saw a nursery because in Finland, it's 100% rooming in with the bb. I definitely prefer the option of having a nursery just so that I can get some rest *if* I want. But on the other hand, pain management techniques & birthing positions are still rather old school in SG. The traditional stirrups are still the default position. In Finland, birthing balls (for pain management), birthing tubs, birthing stools are on the cards... even though in reality, not every woman gets to use the tub.

Tomorrow we're going to the zoo! I hope I won't be too tired :P With a 2 year old and a waddling preggie, I think it'll be a huge achievement just to go on the tram, take in 1 show and briefly visit the 'Kidzworld' before minibeanie or me call it quits!


minibeanie is 2 years, 1 month & 1 day old
microbeanie is 37 weeks 1 day in utero

Full term

microbeanie is officially full term today :) With each passing day and with it the increasing likelihood of birth, I'm feeling nostalgic that these are probably the last few days where I can give my semi-independent toddler my undivided attention. But my love for him certainly won't diminish... Love's a strange thing, I realize. It isn't a finite resource, having one more claimant in fact increases the total pool and that's the wonderful thing about increasing the size of the brood.


minibeanie is 2 years, 1 month old
microbeanie is 37 weeks in utero

Singapore at last

We've been in Singapore for 6 days :) What a relief to be here... The first few days had been taken up by visits to doctors and attending to boring things like banking matters. Now, things have settled down a little and we're trying to take a little breather before the little one comes. There are occasional Braxton Hicks episodes (like now) but at least I know I'll be in good hands just a brief taxi ride away :P


minibeanie is 2 years & 4 weeks old
microbeanie is 36 weeks 6 days in utero

False alarm

Thank God it was Braxton last night!!! It was definitely contractions...I could feel it radiating from front to back and my belly actually felt hard and tense. I was lying in bed with my alarm clock, turning on its night light whenever a wave comes. At one point, it was every 10min even if each lasted only a couple of seconds. After 2 hours or so, it tapered off. By then, I'd been alternating between sleep and wide-awake heart-thumping anxiety for 3.5 hours until day broke.

In the light of day, I'm just glad that it as a false alarm. But when it was actually happening, who could have assured me that?


microbeanie is 35weeks 5 days in utero

Let it be Braxton!

It is 4:21 in the morning and I've been woken up by what feels like a tummy ache. I remember rolling over and returning to sleep a few minutes ago but it came back again. Oh no, God, please don't let this be the real thing. I'll be going back to Singapore in just 2 days!

I'm hoping that it's just a little upset tummy or Braxton Hicks :( The truth is, even after having gone through one before, it's hard to remember what it feels like. And it doesn't help that there's a bit of lower back pain (a possible sign of labour!) which is unusual but which may be caused by us being out in town today. ....Please don't let it come so soon!!


microbeanie is 35weeks 4days in utero

Looking ahead

Less than 2 weeks to go before heading to Singapore to pop! I'm glad I'm at the final stretch. I've been feeling increasingly uncomfortable and tired... not least since I'm nursing a cold right now :(

And I'm constantly thinking have I made all the prep in Singapore and here when I return? For Singapore, I've made all the necessary appointments with dentist, obstetrician, pediatrician and even the hospital tour. And as for Chengdu, I've begun checking the how & where of vaccinations, stocking up of S-size diapers and stockpiling meat in my freezer. The last point probably sounded strange but if I find it a hassle going to the shops (even though in October, we'd have a driver and car at our disposal) even now, what more when a newborn is tethered to me?

Hence, thank heavens there's a Kiwi couple here who started a meat delivery service where they make *real* 100% meat sausages, cut sirloin steaks to your desired weight, make ready-to-eat pies and prepare roasts such as chicken rolled with dried fruits and nuts. Hmph, not the typical confinement food of ginger and pork trotters but that's ok. As long as there's warm food on the table that's easy to prepare, I'll take it :)


minibeanie is 2 years, 1 week & 4 days old
microbeanie is 34 weeks 1 day in utero

I hadn't known that putting 2 words together is such a milestone for toddlers. Guess what minibeanie means when he says "mama mosh"? Mama sit! Hilarious :D I mean, he can say "mama" and "sit" pretty decently but put them together and what do you get? hahah... sometimes, it comes out as "mama dash" which is probably the last thing that mama can do right now.


minibeanie is 2 years & 3 days old
microbeanie is 33 weeks in utero

Baby shower & Birthday party

I'm exhausted. This had been such a hectic weekend that I'm going to need this coming week to rest. On Saturday, my friends threw me a baby shower party. It was wonderful - lots of good food, nice presents, good gossip ;) and even better company. And today, Sunday, it is Alexander's 2nd birthday. And even though I didn't go the whole she-bang like last year's bash, there was still plenty of work baking the cake, making the hors d'oeuvres and decorating etc...

Oh yes, the cake. I decided on a race course design because minibeanie is a petrol-head. He loved it! He didn't seem to have much appetite for the cake but the toy cars on the cake? Those are all he wanted. Assembling the cake was a cinch (& pretty fun for the parents!) but baking the 2 sponges was a huge challenge that took up most of my Saturday. The first attempt went to the freezer because it didn't rise much (I'd use them for a future dessert), the second attempt with a different technique was much better, and because I needed TWO sponge cakes, I'd to bake another one. But the third attempt was a disaster. It went straight into the bin without reaching the oven. Finally, at 10pm Saturday, the fourth and final sponge cake was baked. Thankfully, this one went well.
The birthday tea party went well. I'd invited the same friends in my baby shower; this time the boys joined the party as well :)



minibeanie is 2 years old!!!
microbeanie is 32 weeks 4 days in utero

Book Club

It has been a nap time tradition that I read to minibeanie. We used to sit in a big comfy armchair but since he moved to his own bedroom (and the chair is in mine) and my burgeoning tummy makes it impossible for another bean to sit against it, we have moved to the floor and occasionally, when he gets droopy, on his bed.

For a very long time, his favourite book had been Ten Little Ladybugs. Perhaps it was the tactile feel of the ladybugs but he just loved that book. He just loved to see the ladybugs 'disappear' one by one by flipping through the pages.

These days he usually prefers stories or books on his favourite subject - Cars! Tractors, Rockets! :) But there's a surprising favourite - Eric Carle's From Head to Toes. He loves following all the actions in the book, such as "I am an elephant and I can stomp my foot. Can you do it? ... I can do it!" It is usually the first book he picks out from his little bedside library ;P



minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months & 3 weeks old
microbeanie is 31 weeks 2 days in utero

Sleepless

I'm exhausted. I can't sleep these days. I'd be so tired by 9pm that it would be an effort to trudge upstairs to tuck minibeanie in (even though he says so endearingly "mama mama" and points at the stairs in front of him) but once I lay my head down on the pillow, it'd take a long time before I fall asleep.

One major reason is, I can't get comfortable. From the fifth month on, it only means 1 sleep position - on the side! Turning is practically a pain. Imagine hoisting a watermelon to the other side in slow mo because of a sore pelvis. I haven't slept through the night for a very long time. Yes yes.... this is perhaps God's way of preparing soon-to-be mothers of newborns for the challenges ahead... but that is not in the least bit comforting at the present because I AM GRUMPY AND TIRED!

And as if I don't have enough discomfort in bed, gastric reflux from the obligatory suppers I have these nights make it worse :(

Then, there are the things that go on in my head - things to do before the birth, minibeanie's birthday part next week, worries about the baby and even the fact that I can't sleep. It seems as if the moment the lights go out and all's quiet, my mind runs at warp speed. Great, making mental notes and worrying don't exactly make for a relaxing bedtime routine.

My fuse is <----this----> short today. Just as well I don't drive because I'm positive I can kill someone with my bare hands if he cuts into my lane without warning.... which in China is as commonplace as "你好".

ps. "insomnia often occurs in the third trimester." (source)


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 2 weeks & 3 days old
microbeanie is 30 weeks 5 days in utero

The first 3 nights in the not-so-scary bed

I don't know what other mums think although I suspect some will have differing views. My parenting philosophy is that I'm raising young adults and that means setting them onto a path of independence. From the time they can walk unaided, feed themselves (by whatever messy means) to the time they become contributing citizens of the world. On this matter, let it be known that I expect the boys to move out of the house by the time they're in their early 20s - sure, come back for weekly family dinners but leave the laundry out :P

Since sleep independence is one of the many steps towards this goal, I'm happy to report since the last post that the migration to his own room and bed has been smoother than expected. No tantrums during bedtime except that he wants to play with the cars on his table.

On Friday night, he woke up at 1am. I found him sitting up in bed groggy still. Gently toppled him down to the sleeping position, put the tutti back in, positioned the bolster, gave him a few pats on the bum and that was it. He was out like a light bulb :) 2am: I heard the handle of his door cranked open. minibeanie marched out crying and looking more awake that I liked. I ushered him back to his bed despite vehement protests of wanting to go down to play. He soon quietened down when I tucked him in, sang a little to him and laid down close to him. In a short while, he was asleep and I sneaked out. The next time he got up was at 7am and by then it was dada's duty. Dada marched him back to bed and rather surprisingly, minibeanie managed to fall asleep again, this time until 10am. Heavenly rest for all of us!

Night 2, Saturday. The night passed without any incidents but he got up at 7am ;P

Night 3, Sunday. Ditto.

Then, like a comedy, just when we congratulated ourselves on a job well-done, minibeanie woke up THREE times during Tuesday night.

2am.... 3am.... 5:30am..... and finally at 7:15am, dada decided to throw in the towel and called it a 'night' by getting his morning espresso.

It was the same thing each time it happened. *Clunk!* the door of his bedroom being cranked open, then the baby monitor in our room buzzed (funny how it never picked up anything before that). A split second later, a where-are-you cry followed by censored expletives and groaning in our bed. Then, either dada or me would lumber out of bed, shoo the rascal back into his own room and bed with a curt single-word command, "Bed!" before trudging back to disrupted sleep. As a result, both of us had been panda-eyed for the last 2 days.

I think this would pass. Just like the time when he started sleeping in his open crib and tried to make 6 escapes within a half-hour, this is one of those things. I told dada that this is practice for the not-so-distant future when we'd be waking up every 3 hours. I don't think he was too amused :D


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 1 week & 6 days old
microbeanie is 30 weeks 1 day in utero

Sleep

Today marks a milestone. We're officially migrating minibeanie to his very own room for the night! 2 weeks ago, we started playing in the room during the day - I gave him a set of new army tanks, hovercraft & trucks that were played solely in his bedroom upstairs. This week, he had been taking his afternoon naps in the new bed and now finally today, we're going to take the leap and reclaim our bedroom for the two of us..... at least for the next 2 months ;)

Getting the bedroom ready had been a long work-in-progress. For a year, the room had been nothing more than his closet & changing table ;P Getting the landlord to agree to paint the wall was the first step in February. Then, it was a trip to the hardware store to buy the cheery yellow paint (阳光普照 - "sunshine yellow") that I envisioned the 1 wall to be painted. And since he began watching Winnie the Pooh, thanks to the Christmas DVD he got from his mummi (Finnish for grandma ;), I got a set of made-in-Korea Pooh wall stickers. This was followed by a mega shopping trip at Ikea's... Then, without boring everyone with a blow-by-blow account of what was assembled and when, it was suffice to say that this process of assembly stretched over a period of nearly 2 months. Thus, we finally come to these last 2 weeks where I put away the odds & ends, hung up the pictures and vacuum-sealed & categorized minibeanie's outgrown clothes ready for his micro brother.

He has been asleep for 20min now. I'm 'standing guard' outside his room in the study anticipating the prison break :D Time will tell how many times we'll find ourselves woken up by minibeanie marching into our room in the middle of the night straight into our bed or if we have to get up and soothe him because he cries waking up in a strange room all by himself. But for now, I hope he gets some zzz and for us some privacy.


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months & 2 weeks old
microbeanie is 29 weeks 2 days in utero

Finnish pictures

Finally, the long procrastinated pictures from Finland.

It's a rite of passage for every Finn. First, the sauna followed by a dip in the lake... no matter how freaking cold it is. And trust me, despite it officially being summer, it was supposedly the coldest June in 60 years. The temperature in this lake was therefore a toasty 14C.

Sisu (Finnish for bullheaded determination or stubborness ;) or plain crazy?

It was a tearful struggle getting him out of the lake even though he was shivering

Row, row, row a boat, gently in the lake....

Happy passengers. Our cottage in the background

The sandpit providing hours of fun.

Note his sizable collection of pine cones...

... whereby the hoodlum took joyful glee in throwing them at me

minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 1 week & 6 days old
microbeanie is 29 weeks 1 day in utero

Speaking up

All of a sudden, mb was able to vocalize a couple more words. It was on the first day of our arrival in Helsinki, when he first shouted, "Go go go!", ran to the door and pointed excitedly at it :D It was obvious what he wanted.

"Moooore" was another. Rounded lips and all. Also blatantly clear what he wanted especially when added after a treat of strawberries/blueberries/chocolates/cake.

"NOOooo" finally, a typical toddler word. We were wondering when it would come. And now it has. And when the mood strikes, everything is in the negative.

And his first Chinese word, "谢谢 / "shie shie"!" :D He must have picked it up during our short trip to Beijing.

It is apparent he wants to form words with his tongue but lacks the ability to do so yet. We 'sing' to the ABC song and he looks at my mouth so intently but could only say repeat a few letters and when he does, he breaks out in applause :D


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 4 weeks & 1 day old
microbeanie is 28weeks in utero

Pre-birth pains

I was awoken this morning by a sharp pain that felt like a bad contraction. It was different from the dull ache that accompanies my sleep these days. My thought sequence ran from contraction-preterm labour-Chengdu-gasp*. The conclusion of that jolted me wide awake at 5am. The pain subsided but I felt a sort of mild cramping every now and then. Sleep evaded me at that point so I thought I'd sit up and read up on contractions, false labour & preterm labour from my trusty pregnancy bible, What to Expect during Pregnancy. The pain and cramping went away either because I was distracted when I was reading or due to the change in position. It was Braxton Hicks after all.

Braxton Hicks, a sort of practice labour, are more common in subsequent pregnancies. Well, the fact that they didn't intensify was proof enough that they weren't the real thing :) If I'm paranoid now, it is probably because the first time round with mb, I mistook the real thing for Braxton ;) That, and the fact that at the back of my mind, I've a fear of the delivery unexpectedly happening in Chengdu.

Another sign of the pregnancy advancing is the dreaded leg cramps! The first time for this pregnancy happened a few days ago at the cottage. And just like before, it came on the minute I woke up. Stretched my legs as a reflex and the calf muscles tensed up in a knot refusing to let up for minutes. They get so horribly painful that sometimes I'd to wake DH up to massage my calf muscles and I got them so frequently with minibeanie that I've developed another 'reflex' to counteract these rude awakenings - flex my feet upwards to stretch those muscles whose circulation has been blocked by the uterus during the night.

And my final grouse is that my tailbone is aching now. Lying on my back (accidentally) in my sleep makes it worse than sitting for long periods. Again, I think it's the simple fact that I've now got a basketball-sized belly that isn't just pressing on the nerves, blood vessels, organs, bones and what have you. Little wonder why women can't wait to get their babies out by the 40th week ;)


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months & 4 weeks old
microbeanie is 27 weeks 6 days in utero

'Grandparenting'

Many mothers I know who have to place their children in the care of caregivers face the same tussle - that of differing disciplinary doctrines and child-rearing philosophies from the caregivers'. Worse, if those caregivers are of family. Too lax discipline, too strict, when and how much ice-cream/candies/tv, mealtime philosophy yada yada....... From what I gather and from personal episodes, there are enough examples to fill a book.

It's probably one of the laws of nature that grandparents spoil their grandkids. After all, there's little consequence. At the end of the day, kids go home to their parents who must unfortunately provide some balance or worse, undo the damage of over-indulgence.

In the one week we've been here in Finland, I'm facing this issue for the first time. While my MIL who is really sweet and kind has taken over most of the job of playing and taking care of minibeanie, I am beginning to wonder if the luxury of sleeping in is a double-edged sword. In this one week, minibeanie has become much more vocal (which is a good thing undeniably) but in a wilful way. Now, I don't know if it's just the start of the 'Terrible Twos' phase but it feels more of a struggle getting him to end his playtime. Or I suspect, it could be my doting MIL who has real difficulty in saying no to a toddler. Oh well, it's only for 2 weeks and our MIL does respect the boundaries that we set.

I suppose I'm thankful that I'm in a position that where it comes to domestic governance, I don't have other vested parties other than my husband. It will be awful if I've to deal with a conflicting parenting doctrine on a daily basis. It's also a law of nature that there's always only one queen bee in the hive.


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 2 weeks & 6 days old
microbeanie is 26 weeks 4 days in utero

Updates

Update 1: We have enrolled minibeanie in EtonHouse! We were eligible for a 4% discount on the school fees because we attended the Open House but I managed to wiggle for a 10% 'scholarship' because we were the first Nokia family and we would be paying for the fees ourselves. For that, we had to sign a confidentiality agreement. SHHHHH......!

Also goes to show that everything can be bargained ;)

Update 2: We would be heading to Helsinki on Monday. Just 2 weeks. It would be an extremely short trip compared to my Finnish friends here who usually stayed for 4 weeks or more. We have booked the same cottage, a 150km away from Helsinki, that we used for our wedding reception nearly 4 years ago. I'm looking forward to the trip but bracing myself for the jetlag and the fact that the sun rises at 3am which would mean...... we ALL get up at 3am! :#

Early personality traits?

A question that has been preying on mind a lot these days is, can you tell the personality of your baby even when he's in the womb?

First, an anecdote from a friend. She recalled her son, then a fetus, awake and active at 1am whenever she was trying to fall asleep. Forward a few months later when he was out of his watery habitat, true to form, he was keeping her up at 1am :D My friend described her son as a "screamer" and now the toddler had been described as temperamental.

By contrast, I felt nothing like violent punches or kicks from minibeanie and certainly none of those almost 'Alien' -like movements that visibly move from the east to west end of the belly. The nurses at the hospital actually noted that he was a "calm" baby on the hospital records. His cries usually never rattled our nerves (ok, only once or twice ;) and it always sounded more like a complaint than a full out bawling-his-lungs-out cry. We had been lucky.

Hmm. microbeanie. This little guy has been doing such somersaults, stretches, kicks and other stunts that I'm thinking either I've got a Michael Flately Jr. in me or a would-be Cirque du Soleil performer. Sometimes, he moved so forcefully that I gasped from the force and literally saw my tummy jump. And yes, he IS beginning to keep me up at night because he refuses to go to sleep when I am trying to ;)

I'm laying bets now that microbeanie will be quite different from his calm and cautious big brother. What do you mummies think?

minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 1 week & 4 days old
microbeanie is 25 weeks 3 days in utero

Beijing Trip

The trip to Beijing was a really nice getaway. We stayed at a boutique hotel that was within walking distance to Tiananmen located in a quiet street amidst hutongs and local eateries. With only 3 full days in the city, all we could really do was the mandatory tourist sights - Forbidden City, Great Wall & Temple of Heaven.

Having an ice cream break in the Imperial Garden, Forbidden City

Then, there were of course the evenings where we hunted down Beijing's famous ducks. The first evening, we went to the almost obligatory QuanJuDe (全聚德) where the dish is supposed to originate in the late 1800s. We even headed to the original shop (there are now several branches ;) where the old shopfront was preserved. Despite the wait of 50min, even though we got there at 5:30pm, it was well worth it as the Peking Duck was the best I'd ever eaten. There was none of that heavy layer of fat that I'd come to associate with Peking Ducks eaten in Singapore or Chengdu. Instead, its skin was crispy and the chef had nicely included a sliver of meat. All in, I could eat a whole lot of it without feeling guilty! :D

minibeanie's favourite dish of the house was its liver (盐水鸭肝). It was tasty & soft... quite unlike the overboiled chicken liver pieces sold in Singapore's chicken rice stalls. Again, I could finish off the whole plate if it wasn't for the nagging voice in my head that tells me preggies shouldn't be eating too much liver for their Vitamin A :P

Other dishes we tried were their deboned webbed feet dipped in a wasabi-like radish sauce (芥末鸭掌) as well as fried duck hearts (火燎鸭心). Both were good but weren't in the same league as their Peking Duck or liver.

The other duck restaurant we tried was Da Dong (大董), a new-age restaurant that married tradition with avant garde blending of flavours & serving. The tradition I was referring to was what they're famous for - Peking Ducks roasted in a good old fashioned wood-fired oven. The new age twist in their menu was in the way they served some of their appetizers or dishes - 3 little mouthfuls of appetizers on a long plate, soup in a martini glass... u get the idea. Well, we stuck to their Peking Duck and liver since that was our first visit. Again, the food did not disappoint :)

So, if anyone wants to try the best Peking Ducks in Beijing, here's an article written in Chinese on the Best 5 places to have the duck in Beijing. Otherwise, print out the addresses at the bottom and show it to your concierge to make the reservations 3 days ahead.

全聚德 (no reservation taken; dinner queue starts at 4:30pm -no kidding!)
崇文区前门大街32号

大董
东城区东四十条甲22号南新仓国际大厦1-2楼(东四十条桥西南)
Tel: 010-51690329 51690328


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 1 week & 2 days old
microbeanie is 25 weeks 1 day in utero

A jumping flea

Babycenter.com's newsletter on 22-month-olds has this to say,

"But true jumping, where both feet leave the ground at the same time and then land squarely, is a skill that requires excellent balance and may take a few more months to master."

Well, minibeanie has been jumping with 2 feet off the ground for at least 2 weeks already. For some time, that was all he wanted to do. "Tump tump tump!". That's his word for "jump" :D First 1 foot then all of a sudden, he got it. Then again, he has always been ahead in motor skills. Couldn't say the same for his linguistic skills though. He understands us perfectly in Finnish and English (although he has developed some 'selective hearing' of late ;) but actually says a rather limited number of words. Apple, auntie, bath, car, bus, kakka, eyes, ice ("aye"), thank you, truck, bye... Well, all children develop at their own pace, I suppose!

EtonHouse Open House

We went to EtonHouse's Open House today. It was nice and I think we've half made up our minds to enrol minibeanie at Eton come Fall.

Firstly, we like the school grounds. It is safe, green, has plenty of open space for children to run around and the class rooms are huge. Each classroom has its own child-sized washroom, play and reading corners, cushions & toys.


A plus point is its international staff. This point goes beyond language, there's also the cultural divide (if the management is Chinese) that I've so often encountered in the normal course of life here. For instance, it's beyond my understanding why the Chinese typically do not turn on their heaters in their restaurants/schools/wherever during their winter.... Yes, they have heaters in their premises but they just don't use them! As a result, I have heard stories of children in full winter gear while IN their classes.

As for the International vs. Chinese syllabus dilemma in Eton, first off, I'd definitely like minibeanie to be exposed to Chinese; after all, he does get plenty of English at home. However, there are a couple of factors in favour of the International syllabus though. A recent change in its curriculum means that Chinese gets equal airtime as English. In practical terms, this means that if the English teacher talks about birds one day, the Chinese teacher will talk about the feathered creatures the next day.

And the second factor is the pupil to adult* ratio. As mentioned in my previous blog, the Chinese division has significantly bigger classes. Now, class size and pupil-adult ratio may not be a big thing when the child is 5 or 6, but for a 2-3 year old toddler who may not be toilet trained, able to dress himself or have 2 left feet on even surfaces, an extra pair of hands and eyes is vital to the child's safety. In Finland, daycares for 2 year olds are 4:1 (someone please confirm?). At Eton, I was given the assurance that the maximum ratio for the International division would be 6:1 and 10:1 for the Chinese division.

Ok, time to hit the sack... we haven't fully committed to a decision but I think I know where it's heading ;) On Wednesday, we'd be leaving for Beijing for the long Dragon Boat Festival holiday!

* teacher + teaching assistant


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months & 1 day old
microbeanie is 24 weeks in utero

Chengdu's Angel Hospital

In my earlier post, I said I'd write about my experience at the newest maternity hospital here. Angel Hospital (安琪儿妇产医院) is billed as an ultra modern and luxurious private maternity hospital in Chengdu. It started its operations late last year with a media blitz - billboards on pedestrian sidewalks, bus-stops, back of buses... probably in print and tv medium as well, just that I'm not aware of those.


It felt like entering the lobby of a hotel - marble flooring, a vaulted ceiling surrounded by Corinthian columns and a massive chandelier. A bevy of svelte ladies in smart uniforms greeted me; 1 of them addressed my concern and ushered me to the reception on the second floor. No, not to fill in the official registration papers as I expected but to make a payment to see the doctor. That done, I was ushered into a room where my blood pressure & weight were taken by a junior doctor apparently. This nice lady doctor then ushered me to another room to see the senior obstetrician who answered whatever questions I had and assessed my medical condition. As I had requested for the 4D ultrasound scan, I was brought to a waiting area to wait for my turn at the sonographer's lab. The scan done, I was brought back to the obstetrician's office where she insisted the fetal heartrate be heard using the doppler EVEN though a while ago, the sonographer had seen and heard the heartrate. "I just want to hear it for myself," she said. So for the second time that day, I had the yucky gooey lubricant smeared on my belly :P

As I made my appointment for the next visit, I was vastly surprised that the date and timing were entirely at my disposal.

Is July 4th ok?
- yes, that's alright.
what about 10am?
- You can come in anytime.
huh...?
- we're here for you.

My contact numbers, date of appointment were all scribbled on a piece of paper. No centralized database existed as far as I could see. And definitely no computerized system for scheduling. And there was certainly no patient's reference number or card. It felt like I was buying a McChicken.

The next stop was the urine test. I was given a plastic cup with a lid to pee in. The ladies' room did not disappoint. Swanky, new, all marble EXCEPT that the cubicle didn't have a ledge for the cup. The junior lady doctor then brought me to the lab counter where specimens were deposited. No sticker with my name on the cup.. it was just placed on a printed form which I supposed mentioned my name and stated that I'd paid for the lab test. 20cm away was a similar cup of pale yellow liquid. The possibility of someone committing mischief or making a mistake is kind of high, isn't it?

Finally, as this was my first visit, I was given a tour of the wards. Most were single bed rooms with a nice sofa and plasma tv. The suites had an adjoining room with a bed and a kitchenette with a small dining table. It was luxuriously beautiful and felt more like a hotel than a hospital.

Yet somehow, it missed the mark for me. Despite all the marble and cherubs spouting fountains, I couldn't shake off the feeling that underneath all the glam, there wasn't much substance down there. Sure, they may have great obstetricians with years of experience and have bought the latest technology but do their internal processes work seamlessly to provide the best medical care especially in an emergency? In Information Science, the success of a company depends not on its individual parts but on how well each part is integrated with each other: people, technology, process, culture etc.

Finally, I had a nagging concern: what if there was a medical emergency with the mother or newborn? I didn't see any neonatal wards and there was only one neonatal specialist listed on Angel's prospectus - the great majority were obstetricians/gynecologists while the rest were midwives. Nice plasma tvs but Angel Hospital will not be my first choice to birth in.

School debate

Without meaning to sound callous, we're hoping to send minibeanie to a playschool when the baby comes along. Not that I want him out of my hair for a couple of hours each day but I feel a new environment will be stimulating for him socially and intellectually. Ok ok... if I have to be totally honest, I DO cherish a few hours of 'free' time ;P

There have been a few options we're toying with. The first decision will be the International vs. Chinese syllabus. The International route leads basically to the one school which takes in children from age 2 - there isn't much choice we have there ;) Naturally, our options open up considerably with the Chinese route. There is that aforementioned school which has a parallel Chinese division and there are also a host of local options such as the very auspicious sounding "Golden Apple" or a playschool located within the grounds of Sichuan University.

From my discussions with parents, the main differences between the International and Chinese divisions are firstly, the pupil-to-teacher ratio where it's somewhat lower in the former than in the latter. Secondly, the Chinese route follows the syllabus as set forth by the Chinese education ministry. I can't comment on which syllabus is better because I do not have detailed information on both. But going by the pupil-to-teacher ratio as a factor, I'm inclined to prefer the International route.

Unfortunately, the International route is at an international school which almost by default costs an arm and a leg. Friends from Singapore will be familiar with this school, it's EtonHouse. As such, we're looking forward to Eton's Open House on Tuesday where we'll explore the grounds, learn more about its International and Chinese divisions and of course, the impact on our bank balance.

All the logical reasoning aside, both dada and I can't believe that our little one will be heading off to school soon! he's growing up so quickly!! :((


minibeanie is 1 year, 9 months & 4 weeks old
microbeanie is 23 weeks 4 days in utero

Is it easier the second time?

Friends have asked if the second time round is easier. Hmm. Well, I kind of have a little experience so I suppose that makes it a little 'easier'. Then again, every pregnancy is different. But having to take care of and nurture a toddler entering his "terrible twos" is a another game altogether.

Instead of sitting on my arse in conference call meetings, it is reading-lego-playground duty, sometimes in swift progression ;) But I really shouldn't complain as I'm lucky to have all the help I can get. Our domestic helper who now comes in every weekday for at least half a day brings minibeanie down to the playground to burn all that energy that will otherwise have driven me crazy. And really, although he has his moments, he doesn't really have them all too often and if I can rise above the occasion by adopting a zen attitude, it usually passes without much fuss.

Therefore, I guess there's no simple answer to the question. Just because I've popped one out before, it doesn't make it easier. It's not like baking cookies. And you can't apply "economies of scale" (unless you count the toys & clothes that can be shared); in fact, I think there's dis-economies of scale! There, I think that's my answer :)


minibeanie is 1 year, 9 months, 3 weeks & 2 days old
microbeanie is 22 weeks 5 days in utero

Haute couture of the Frumps

Someone please shoot me if I ever wear one of these!

minibeanie is 1 year, 9 months, 2 weeks & 3 days old
microbeanie is 22 weeks in utero

One year on

Today marks the anniversary of the 8.0 earthquake that devastated so many lives in Sichuan. Read the blog's posts on the earthquake here.

According to China Daily, more than 87000 people are dead or missing and by an official estimate, more than 5000 children. I feel so blessed that we escaped unscathed from the quake.... if we have a moment to spare in our busy schedules, let us pause, reflect and pray.

Emei getaway

Our weekend trip to Mount Emei was wonderful. We arrived on Saturday at our hotel nearly 2pm. We decided to hit the road for the summit almost immediately because of a natural phenomenon that was supposed to take place between 3 and 4pm - the sea of clouds (云海). And it was just as well because our driver took an hour to bring us to 2700m. From there to the summit of 3079m, it was to be a 1.5 km hike followed by a 2 minute cable car ride to the Golden Summit (金顶).

Dada carried minibeanie on the baby carrier when we began the climb. The air was moist as the entire mountain was enveloped in clouds - we were walking in clouds! Unfortunately, that also meant we couldn't see much beyond. So much for for the 'sea of clouds'. Thankfully though, it was cool because soon we were huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf. Excellent cardio workout! I have to add that dada was complaining of sore knees and our friend was feeling faint while the slight expectant lady in the group was still rather sprightly after the hike :D

The cable car ride was nice although it passed in a haze - literally! :D We arrived at the Golden Summit without too much time to spare as the last ride was at 6pm :( Ascending a long flight of steps, we were met by the world's highest golden Buddha, Puxian. It stands at 48m tall with a weight of 660 tons. The 10 head sculptures in 10 directions of Puxian signify the boundless practices and wishes of Puxian. At the summit was also the monastery that was founded as early as 1st century AD. I wish we had time to explore the place a lot more leisurely and read up on its history!!

Quite amazingly, we were the only the only foreigners around. And of course, minibeanie always gets the attention of all the ladies.

Puxian shrouded in clouds on our ascend

Clearer weather on our descent

The mission for next day was Good Tea Hunting. We went tea tasting at the renowned Emei Xueya 峨眉雪芽 (Snow bud of Emei? Transliteration is always a tricky if not hilarious affair ;) and after that, found our way to another company which had a tea plantation in the vicinity. Zhuye Qing's 竹叶青 ("Green bamboo leaves") tea plantation/tea house/museum grounds were beautifully landscaped in the traditional Chinese style. All in, we tasted and bought some great green tea only grown in Sichuan.

There are altogether 6 categories of tea with green tea being the least processed and not in the least fermented. [Green tea, 绿茶, is not to be confused with another category of 'green' tea that is fermented 青茶). Green tea has to be made with 85C water - too hot and its essential oils evaporate thus changing its taste. Green tea shouldn't be steeped unlike black tea as the first and second brew have the most delicate of flavours. Subsequent brews would result in a slightly bitter palate. The type of vessel is also important. One has to use either glass or porcelain with the former preferred as the unfurling and dancing tea leaves are a visual treat by itself.

A couple of months ago, I was so keen to learn about tea that I bought a Chinese book on tea! ... along with a Chinese dictionary ;D I realized that there was a real dearth of knowledge among the English literature on Chinese tea. All the books on tea I found on Amazon were superficial in depth and nothing more than glossy picture books. Perhaps I should research and write a book on Chinese tea :) I wonder if there's interest in this topic...


minibeanie is 1 year, 9 months, 2 weeks & 2 days old
microbeanie is 21weeks 6days in utero

Getting away

My advice to any would-be parents is, "get away before your whole life changes!" And I was really glad we went to Buenos Aires in my 20th week before minibeanie came along (in fact, it was somewhere above Brazil when I felt the first definitive kick from minibeanie). Two years on, just when we get comfortable with the toddler routine, we feel that our world is about to be rocked again.

[deep breaths]

There's no time like the present so we thought we should make some holiday plans in the next 3 months. First stop. Mount Emei (峨眉山). We'd been pathetically sequestered in Chengdu city for a year, so besides claiming to have seen the pandas, we should add 1 of China's most sacred Buddhist mountains to our list. After all, it's 'merely'* 150km away.

Like many of our trips here, the impetus was a friend visiting. Thus, this weekend, I've arranged for us a driver and his car to be our chauffeur for the 1.5 day trip. Accommodation has been booked in a 5* hotel at the foot of the mountain with hot springs. Unfortunately, I won't be able to partake in the hot springs but I'm hoping that we get some magnificent views at the summit, visit Emei's famous tea plantation (峨眉雪芽) and visit some monasteries, supposedly the birthplace of Shaolin martial arts.

Can't wait!


* no distance is near enough with a toddler!


minibeanie is 1 year, 9 months, 1 week & 5 days old
microbeanie is 21 weeks 2 days in utero