Looking ahead

Less than 2 weeks to go before heading to Singapore to pop! I'm glad I'm at the final stretch. I've been feeling increasingly uncomfortable and tired... not least since I'm nursing a cold right now :(

And I'm constantly thinking have I made all the prep in Singapore and here when I return? For Singapore, I've made all the necessary appointments with dentist, obstetrician, pediatrician and even the hospital tour. And as for Chengdu, I've begun checking the how & where of vaccinations, stocking up of S-size diapers and stockpiling meat in my freezer. The last point probably sounded strange but if I find it a hassle going to the shops (even though in October, we'd have a driver and car at our disposal) even now, what more when a newborn is tethered to me?

Hence, thank heavens there's a Kiwi couple here who started a meat delivery service where they make *real* 100% meat sausages, cut sirloin steaks to your desired weight, make ready-to-eat pies and prepare roasts such as chicken rolled with dried fruits and nuts. Hmph, not the typical confinement food of ginger and pork trotters but that's ok. As long as there's warm food on the table that's easy to prepare, I'll take it :)


minibeanie is 2 years, 1 week & 4 days old
microbeanie is 34 weeks 1 day in utero

I hadn't known that putting 2 words together is such a milestone for toddlers. Guess what minibeanie means when he says "mama mosh"? Mama sit! Hilarious :D I mean, he can say "mama" and "sit" pretty decently but put them together and what do you get? hahah... sometimes, it comes out as "mama dash" which is probably the last thing that mama can do right now.


minibeanie is 2 years & 3 days old
microbeanie is 33 weeks in utero

Baby shower & Birthday party

I'm exhausted. This had been such a hectic weekend that I'm going to need this coming week to rest. On Saturday, my friends threw me a baby shower party. It was wonderful - lots of good food, nice presents, good gossip ;) and even better company. And today, Sunday, it is Alexander's 2nd birthday. And even though I didn't go the whole she-bang like last year's bash, there was still plenty of work baking the cake, making the hors d'oeuvres and decorating etc...

Oh yes, the cake. I decided on a race course design because minibeanie is a petrol-head. He loved it! He didn't seem to have much appetite for the cake but the toy cars on the cake? Those are all he wanted. Assembling the cake was a cinch (& pretty fun for the parents!) but baking the 2 sponges was a huge challenge that took up most of my Saturday. The first attempt went to the freezer because it didn't rise much (I'd use them for a future dessert), the second attempt with a different technique was much better, and because I needed TWO sponge cakes, I'd to bake another one. But the third attempt was a disaster. It went straight into the bin without reaching the oven. Finally, at 10pm Saturday, the fourth and final sponge cake was baked. Thankfully, this one went well.
The birthday tea party went well. I'd invited the same friends in my baby shower; this time the boys joined the party as well :)



minibeanie is 2 years old!!!
microbeanie is 32 weeks 4 days in utero

Book Club

It has been a nap time tradition that I read to minibeanie. We used to sit in a big comfy armchair but since he moved to his own bedroom (and the chair is in mine) and my burgeoning tummy makes it impossible for another bean to sit against it, we have moved to the floor and occasionally, when he gets droopy, on his bed.

For a very long time, his favourite book had been Ten Little Ladybugs. Perhaps it was the tactile feel of the ladybugs but he just loved that book. He just loved to see the ladybugs 'disappear' one by one by flipping through the pages.

These days he usually prefers stories or books on his favourite subject - Cars! Tractors, Rockets! :) But there's a surprising favourite - Eric Carle's From Head to Toes. He loves following all the actions in the book, such as "I am an elephant and I can stomp my foot. Can you do it? ... I can do it!" It is usually the first book he picks out from his little bedside library ;P



minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months & 3 weeks old
microbeanie is 31 weeks 2 days in utero

Sleepless

I'm exhausted. I can't sleep these days. I'd be so tired by 9pm that it would be an effort to trudge upstairs to tuck minibeanie in (even though he says so endearingly "mama mama" and points at the stairs in front of him) but once I lay my head down on the pillow, it'd take a long time before I fall asleep.

One major reason is, I can't get comfortable. From the fifth month on, it only means 1 sleep position - on the side! Turning is practically a pain. Imagine hoisting a watermelon to the other side in slow mo because of a sore pelvis. I haven't slept through the night for a very long time. Yes yes.... this is perhaps God's way of preparing soon-to-be mothers of newborns for the challenges ahead... but that is not in the least bit comforting at the present because I AM GRUMPY AND TIRED!

And as if I don't have enough discomfort in bed, gastric reflux from the obligatory suppers I have these nights make it worse :(

Then, there are the things that go on in my head - things to do before the birth, minibeanie's birthday part next week, worries about the baby and even the fact that I can't sleep. It seems as if the moment the lights go out and all's quiet, my mind runs at warp speed. Great, making mental notes and worrying don't exactly make for a relaxing bedtime routine.

My fuse is <----this----> short today. Just as well I don't drive because I'm positive I can kill someone with my bare hands if he cuts into my lane without warning.... which in China is as commonplace as "你好".

ps. "insomnia often occurs in the third trimester." (source)


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 2 weeks & 3 days old
microbeanie is 30 weeks 5 days in utero

The first 3 nights in the not-so-scary bed

I don't know what other mums think although I suspect some will have differing views. My parenting philosophy is that I'm raising young adults and that means setting them onto a path of independence. From the time they can walk unaided, feed themselves (by whatever messy means) to the time they become contributing citizens of the world. On this matter, let it be known that I expect the boys to move out of the house by the time they're in their early 20s - sure, come back for weekly family dinners but leave the laundry out :P

Since sleep independence is one of the many steps towards this goal, I'm happy to report since the last post that the migration to his own room and bed has been smoother than expected. No tantrums during bedtime except that he wants to play with the cars on his table.

On Friday night, he woke up at 1am. I found him sitting up in bed groggy still. Gently toppled him down to the sleeping position, put the tutti back in, positioned the bolster, gave him a few pats on the bum and that was it. He was out like a light bulb :) 2am: I heard the handle of his door cranked open. minibeanie marched out crying and looking more awake that I liked. I ushered him back to his bed despite vehement protests of wanting to go down to play. He soon quietened down when I tucked him in, sang a little to him and laid down close to him. In a short while, he was asleep and I sneaked out. The next time he got up was at 7am and by then it was dada's duty. Dada marched him back to bed and rather surprisingly, minibeanie managed to fall asleep again, this time until 10am. Heavenly rest for all of us!

Night 2, Saturday. The night passed without any incidents but he got up at 7am ;P

Night 3, Sunday. Ditto.

Then, like a comedy, just when we congratulated ourselves on a job well-done, minibeanie woke up THREE times during Tuesday night.

2am.... 3am.... 5:30am..... and finally at 7:15am, dada decided to throw in the towel and called it a 'night' by getting his morning espresso.

It was the same thing each time it happened. *Clunk!* the door of his bedroom being cranked open, then the baby monitor in our room buzzed (funny how it never picked up anything before that). A split second later, a where-are-you cry followed by censored expletives and groaning in our bed. Then, either dada or me would lumber out of bed, shoo the rascal back into his own room and bed with a curt single-word command, "Bed!" before trudging back to disrupted sleep. As a result, both of us had been panda-eyed for the last 2 days.

I think this would pass. Just like the time when he started sleeping in his open crib and tried to make 6 escapes within a half-hour, this is one of those things. I told dada that this is practice for the not-so-distant future when we'd be waking up every 3 hours. I don't think he was too amused :D


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 1 week & 6 days old
microbeanie is 30 weeks 1 day in utero

Sleep

Today marks a milestone. We're officially migrating minibeanie to his very own room for the night! 2 weeks ago, we started playing in the room during the day - I gave him a set of new army tanks, hovercraft & trucks that were played solely in his bedroom upstairs. This week, he had been taking his afternoon naps in the new bed and now finally today, we're going to take the leap and reclaim our bedroom for the two of us..... at least for the next 2 months ;)

Getting the bedroom ready had been a long work-in-progress. For a year, the room had been nothing more than his closet & changing table ;P Getting the landlord to agree to paint the wall was the first step in February. Then, it was a trip to the hardware store to buy the cheery yellow paint (阳光普照 - "sunshine yellow") that I envisioned the 1 wall to be painted. And since he began watching Winnie the Pooh, thanks to the Christmas DVD he got from his mummi (Finnish for grandma ;), I got a set of made-in-Korea Pooh wall stickers. This was followed by a mega shopping trip at Ikea's... Then, without boring everyone with a blow-by-blow account of what was assembled and when, it was suffice to say that this process of assembly stretched over a period of nearly 2 months. Thus, we finally come to these last 2 weeks where I put away the odds & ends, hung up the pictures and vacuum-sealed & categorized minibeanie's outgrown clothes ready for his micro brother.

He has been asleep for 20min now. I'm 'standing guard' outside his room in the study anticipating the prison break :D Time will tell how many times we'll find ourselves woken up by minibeanie marching into our room in the middle of the night straight into our bed or if we have to get up and soothe him because he cries waking up in a strange room all by himself. But for now, I hope he gets some zzz and for us some privacy.


minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months & 2 weeks old
microbeanie is 29 weeks 2 days in utero

Finnish pictures

Finally, the long procrastinated pictures from Finland.

It's a rite of passage for every Finn. First, the sauna followed by a dip in the lake... no matter how freaking cold it is. And trust me, despite it officially being summer, it was supposedly the coldest June in 60 years. The temperature in this lake was therefore a toasty 14C.

Sisu (Finnish for bullheaded determination or stubborness ;) or plain crazy?

It was a tearful struggle getting him out of the lake even though he was shivering

Row, row, row a boat, gently in the lake....

Happy passengers. Our cottage in the background

The sandpit providing hours of fun.

Note his sizable collection of pine cones...

... whereby the hoodlum took joyful glee in throwing them at me

minibeanie is 1 year, 11 months, 1 week & 6 days old
microbeanie is 29 weeks 1 day in utero

Speaking up

All of a sudden, mb was able to vocalize a couple more words. It was on the first day of our arrival in Helsinki, when he first shouted, "Go go go!", ran to the door and pointed excitedly at it :D It was obvious what he wanted.

"Moooore" was another. Rounded lips and all. Also blatantly clear what he wanted especially when added after a treat of strawberries/blueberries/chocolates/cake.

"NOOooo" finally, a typical toddler word. We were wondering when it would come. And now it has. And when the mood strikes, everything is in the negative.

And his first Chinese word, "谢谢 / "shie shie"!" :D He must have picked it up during our short trip to Beijing.

It is apparent he wants to form words with his tongue but lacks the ability to do so yet. We 'sing' to the ABC song and he looks at my mouth so intently but could only say repeat a few letters and when he does, he breaks out in applause :D


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 4 weeks & 1 day old
microbeanie is 28weeks in utero

Pre-birth pains

I was awoken this morning by a sharp pain that felt like a bad contraction. It was different from the dull ache that accompanies my sleep these days. My thought sequence ran from contraction-preterm labour-Chengdu-gasp*. The conclusion of that jolted me wide awake at 5am. The pain subsided but I felt a sort of mild cramping every now and then. Sleep evaded me at that point so I thought I'd sit up and read up on contractions, false labour & preterm labour from my trusty pregnancy bible, What to Expect during Pregnancy. The pain and cramping went away either because I was distracted when I was reading or due to the change in position. It was Braxton Hicks after all.

Braxton Hicks, a sort of practice labour, are more common in subsequent pregnancies. Well, the fact that they didn't intensify was proof enough that they weren't the real thing :) If I'm paranoid now, it is probably because the first time round with mb, I mistook the real thing for Braxton ;) That, and the fact that at the back of my mind, I've a fear of the delivery unexpectedly happening in Chengdu.

Another sign of the pregnancy advancing is the dreaded leg cramps! The first time for this pregnancy happened a few days ago at the cottage. And just like before, it came on the minute I woke up. Stretched my legs as a reflex and the calf muscles tensed up in a knot refusing to let up for minutes. They get so horribly painful that sometimes I'd to wake DH up to massage my calf muscles and I got them so frequently with minibeanie that I've developed another 'reflex' to counteract these rude awakenings - flex my feet upwards to stretch those muscles whose circulation has been blocked by the uterus during the night.

And my final grouse is that my tailbone is aching now. Lying on my back (accidentally) in my sleep makes it worse than sitting for long periods. Again, I think it's the simple fact that I've now got a basketball-sized belly that isn't just pressing on the nerves, blood vessels, organs, bones and what have you. Little wonder why women can't wait to get their babies out by the 40th week ;)


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months & 4 weeks old
microbeanie is 27 weeks 6 days in utero

'Grandparenting'

Many mothers I know who have to place their children in the care of caregivers face the same tussle - that of differing disciplinary doctrines and child-rearing philosophies from the caregivers'. Worse, if those caregivers are of family. Too lax discipline, too strict, when and how much ice-cream/candies/tv, mealtime philosophy yada yada....... From what I gather and from personal episodes, there are enough examples to fill a book.

It's probably one of the laws of nature that grandparents spoil their grandkids. After all, there's little consequence. At the end of the day, kids go home to their parents who must unfortunately provide some balance or worse, undo the damage of over-indulgence.

In the one week we've been here in Finland, I'm facing this issue for the first time. While my MIL who is really sweet and kind has taken over most of the job of playing and taking care of minibeanie, I am beginning to wonder if the luxury of sleeping in is a double-edged sword. In this one week, minibeanie has become much more vocal (which is a good thing undeniably) but in a wilful way. Now, I don't know if it's just the start of the 'Terrible Twos' phase but it feels more of a struggle getting him to end his playtime. Or I suspect, it could be my doting MIL who has real difficulty in saying no to a toddler. Oh well, it's only for 2 weeks and our MIL does respect the boundaries that we set.

I suppose I'm thankful that I'm in a position that where it comes to domestic governance, I don't have other vested parties other than my husband. It will be awful if I've to deal with a conflicting parenting doctrine on a daily basis. It's also a law of nature that there's always only one queen bee in the hive.


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 2 weeks & 6 days old
microbeanie is 26 weeks 4 days in utero

Updates

Update 1: We have enrolled minibeanie in EtonHouse! We were eligible for a 4% discount on the school fees because we attended the Open House but I managed to wiggle for a 10% 'scholarship' because we were the first Nokia family and we would be paying for the fees ourselves. For that, we had to sign a confidentiality agreement. SHHHHH......!

Also goes to show that everything can be bargained ;)

Update 2: We would be heading to Helsinki on Monday. Just 2 weeks. It would be an extremely short trip compared to my Finnish friends here who usually stayed for 4 weeks or more. We have booked the same cottage, a 150km away from Helsinki, that we used for our wedding reception nearly 4 years ago. I'm looking forward to the trip but bracing myself for the jetlag and the fact that the sun rises at 3am which would mean...... we ALL get up at 3am! :#

Early personality traits?

A question that has been preying on mind a lot these days is, can you tell the personality of your baby even when he's in the womb?

First, an anecdote from a friend. She recalled her son, then a fetus, awake and active at 1am whenever she was trying to fall asleep. Forward a few months later when he was out of his watery habitat, true to form, he was keeping her up at 1am :D My friend described her son as a "screamer" and now the toddler had been described as temperamental.

By contrast, I felt nothing like violent punches or kicks from minibeanie and certainly none of those almost 'Alien' -like movements that visibly move from the east to west end of the belly. The nurses at the hospital actually noted that he was a "calm" baby on the hospital records. His cries usually never rattled our nerves (ok, only once or twice ;) and it always sounded more like a complaint than a full out bawling-his-lungs-out cry. We had been lucky.

Hmm. microbeanie. This little guy has been doing such somersaults, stretches, kicks and other stunts that I'm thinking either I've got a Michael Flately Jr. in me or a would-be Cirque du Soleil performer. Sometimes, he moved so forcefully that I gasped from the force and literally saw my tummy jump. And yes, he IS beginning to keep me up at night because he refuses to go to sleep when I am trying to ;)

I'm laying bets now that microbeanie will be quite different from his calm and cautious big brother. What do you mummies think?

minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 1 week & 4 days old
microbeanie is 25 weeks 3 days in utero

Beijing Trip

The trip to Beijing was a really nice getaway. We stayed at a boutique hotel that was within walking distance to Tiananmen located in a quiet street amidst hutongs and local eateries. With only 3 full days in the city, all we could really do was the mandatory tourist sights - Forbidden City, Great Wall & Temple of Heaven.

Having an ice cream break in the Imperial Garden, Forbidden City

Then, there were of course the evenings where we hunted down Beijing's famous ducks. The first evening, we went to the almost obligatory QuanJuDe (全聚德) where the dish is supposed to originate in the late 1800s. We even headed to the original shop (there are now several branches ;) where the old shopfront was preserved. Despite the wait of 50min, even though we got there at 5:30pm, it was well worth it as the Peking Duck was the best I'd ever eaten. There was none of that heavy layer of fat that I'd come to associate with Peking Ducks eaten in Singapore or Chengdu. Instead, its skin was crispy and the chef had nicely included a sliver of meat. All in, I could eat a whole lot of it without feeling guilty! :D

minibeanie's favourite dish of the house was its liver (盐水鸭肝). It was tasty & soft... quite unlike the overboiled chicken liver pieces sold in Singapore's chicken rice stalls. Again, I could finish off the whole plate if it wasn't for the nagging voice in my head that tells me preggies shouldn't be eating too much liver for their Vitamin A :P

Other dishes we tried were their deboned webbed feet dipped in a wasabi-like radish sauce (芥末鸭掌) as well as fried duck hearts (火燎鸭心). Both were good but weren't in the same league as their Peking Duck or liver.

The other duck restaurant we tried was Da Dong (大董), a new-age restaurant that married tradition with avant garde blending of flavours & serving. The tradition I was referring to was what they're famous for - Peking Ducks roasted in a good old fashioned wood-fired oven. The new age twist in their menu was in the way they served some of their appetizers or dishes - 3 little mouthfuls of appetizers on a long plate, soup in a martini glass... u get the idea. Well, we stuck to their Peking Duck and liver since that was our first visit. Again, the food did not disappoint :)

So, if anyone wants to try the best Peking Ducks in Beijing, here's an article written in Chinese on the Best 5 places to have the duck in Beijing. Otherwise, print out the addresses at the bottom and show it to your concierge to make the reservations 3 days ahead.

全聚德 (no reservation taken; dinner queue starts at 4:30pm -no kidding!)
崇文区前门大街32号

大董
东城区东四十条甲22号南新仓国际大厦1-2楼(东四十条桥西南)
Tel: 010-51690329 51690328


minibeanie is 1 year, 10 months, 1 week & 2 days old
microbeanie is 25 weeks 1 day in utero